Public Service Announcement (aka “I violently decline your FB Petitions”)

Dear People Of the World:

Celebrities are people too. Just people. Humans who have talent that paired with opportunity to launch them across the airwaves. Humans. And yes, some of their adorers may take appreciation all the way to extreme, creepy and/or dangerous, but not all admirers are ridiculous. And it has always bothered me, the way we seem to think of them as public property, flying into outrage at things they do to protect themselves from our prying, digging deep no matter how far they run. It’s so wrong. These are PEOPLE, people. NOT property! But I digress and now I repeat: Not all admirers are bad.

Some of us are just people who have invested time and emotion in following their careers, the talent they have to offer, the possibility of dreams they represent, the escape hatch they brought us in dark times…there are a million reasons we love the ones we love. This does not make any of us idiots for mourning their loss.

I’d like to think my life touches more people than I really know of; that when I die, people will remember things that even I have forgotten; that my mark stretched beyond the boundaries of my immediate social circles. Don’t we all want to matter more than we could even imagine?

So permit mourning fans the freedom to cry or bemoan the loss of our famous ‘friends’, and the dignity to grieve for a fellow human life cut short. And for the love of pizza and pie, do NOT send me any pics, posters or group petitions lambasting people for “crying over one when millions die”. Refrain from doing so PARTICULARLY if you’re not doing anything whatsoever for said millions. Short of my private tears (and public blogs) actually smacking resources out of your hands that would have otherwise been used to go forth and save the armies of Wounded, Hungry and Otherwise Forlorn & Destitute, I’d really rather you leave me entirely alone.  

No, I do not want to join your group. And although I’d love to see you change the name to something more appropriate, say…. The Sofa Sanctimonious League, it still would not change how I feel about your preposterous juxtapositions between one grief and another, with no participation from you in either. 

So thank you, dear Facebook and your frightening propensity for spawning these Like-hungry groups, but no. I decline. I will not sign your petition or join your group. I will not sign today, I will not sign tomorrow. I will not give you likes. You can’t have them to borrow. I will not like you, not one bit and if I tell the truth- I’ve been thinking quite a lot of deleting all of you.  

So if you don’t mind…hand me a tissue or get out of my way.

PS: If you’re so inclined there are so many, many organizations who desperately need your help. I strongly encourage you to do something more than a LOLCat image mashup to really HELP someone. Anyone. Google ‘help the poor’ and run wild among the options.


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